I don’t claim to be an expert in relationships, but over the years I have noticed some common patterns in human behaviour. I’m sure most of you know someone who constantly breaks up with their partner then shortly after they get back together or who even bounces from one relationship straight into another? I certainly do. There are many scenarios providing us clues into who is too quick to jump into a relationship who gives them any sort of attention. Being aware of what your intentions are can help pinpoint your emotions before heading into an unwanted relationship, preventing some massive heartbreak in the future.
Who is this article for? – Anyone who wants to learn more about relationships and human behaviour.
There are many deep route causes but I will be going over the 5 most common warning signs relationships start for the wrong reasons, to hopefully make you think twice before making a hasty decision. Now let’s begin…
To Feel Loved
I’m sure you have heard the cliche quote “You need to love yourself first before you can love others.” Most people these days seem to be in a relationship to fill a void or insecurity. Sometimes even Lust is confused for Love. Your emotions can tend to fabricate qualities that don’t even exist in the other person because you’re so invested in the outcome. Look at your potential partner as a blank sheet of paper instead. A high-value person doesn’t just give their love to anyone. See if they deserve it first.
Cannot Enjoy Being Alone
Anyone who is quick to jump into a relationship to avoid being single should trigger some warning signs. Generally, they feel the need to join in on someone’s else’s life and have not taken the time to get to know themselves. Spending time with yourself can be an important part of life and once you enjoy being alone you will find your relationships will only benefit from this developed quality. Being alone can help create a deeper perspective on your own emotions you were unaware of. If you cannot enjoy being by yourself and consistently have the need to date the next person that comes along then there is a deeper issue going on inside of you. Not being aware of your emotions gets people into relationships for all the wrong reasons. With so many distractions in life, people are not discovering who they really are deep down. Time in solitude can be extra beneficial for anyone who needs to find out what they really want out of life. If you haven’t had a decent amount of time to yourself while being single, then maybe this is just what you need before jumping into the next relationship.
Some people crave attention from the opposite sex for motivation and/or to receive compliments to try and make themselves feel better. This is another sign they are insecure about who they are as a person and don’t love themselves yet. Ideally, you want to be going into a relationship knowing your value and worth, not needing anything from the other person apart from unconditional love. In this social media world, everyone is externally looking for validation. Relationships are no different. Ideally, you want to be going into a relationship with a full glass, not with an empty one hoping someone else is going to fill it up for you. Learning to love yourself can be very valuable before heading into any serious relationship.
Society has led us to believe being in a relationship is always the right thing to do. It doesn’t matter who with, as long as it’s with someone. This social pressure from family and friends can take its toll, especially when religion, your age and having children come into play. Some people can jump into a relationship to make others happy but not for themselves. This can come down to feelings of inadequacy or not being worthy enough for their ideal partner or relationship. People tend to forget not everyone is compatible and there is nothing worse than forcing a relationship.
Expanding your interests and choosing yourself really can open doors to meeting like-minded people, who you never thought you could possibly meet. You may even want to take some time away from people who are whispering in your ear, to gather your thoughts to find out what you really want out of life and any relationships you aim to have in the future.
Human’s by nature tend to look for the easier option or shortcut. A lot of relationships are created to be convenient for each other. Whether it’s to save money, help with day to day tasks or just settling with a partner who was the first to say yes. It’s a choice which requires less energy and potentially reduce your overall growth. While all of the above things can be great, sometimes these luxuries can tend to make us complacent. Is this potential relationship going to elevate you to the next level? Are they going to support you when the going gets tough? Avoid any relationship where you both go through the motions, where every week is the same and the other person is not pushing you to become the best version of yourself. If not, then maybe it’s best to move on and not be tempted by the basic comforts of an average relationship.
While there are so many different reasons people get into toxic relationships, these 5 warning signs are the most common I have come across. Relationships can be beneficial when starting from the right foundations, however, seeing so many failed attempts, (especially from the younger generation) I feel people need to learn to take their time before hastily jumping into any relationship. Look out for these five signs, I hope this helps anyone to avoid a frustrating relationship and saves you valuable time and well-being.